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You Girls Don’t Really Want An Emotionally Available Guy

This entry is part 1 of 2 in the series You Girls Don't Really Want An Emotionally Available Guy

He’s your dream guy.

The guy who is able to share his feelings with you.

Who doesn’t hold back on you.

Doesn’t stoically keep himself bottled up and unresponsive to you.

You’re so tired of being with emotionally unavailable guys. You want a guy who will really let you in and show you how he feels!

But do you really?

I don’t think so.

You see a guy who shows his feelings will show you his fear.

He will show you how hurt he is when he puts himself out there and people criticize and reject him.

How discouraged it makes him feel when he struggles to achieve his goals and they keep evading him.

He will show you his despair at ever being able to really get anywhere in life.

You see if a guy really shows you his feelings, you’ll discover that he’s a lot more like you than you thought he was.

Because you think he is strong.

Able to protect you and keep you safe, at least emotionally if not physically or economically any more.

This is a big part of what attracted you to him in the first place.

That he wasn’t like you.

Emotionally up and down.

Well…

He is strong.

But he’s also all the other things I’ve shared with you just now.

Being emotionally available is the whole package.

But that’s not what you want.

What you girls really mean when you say “I want an emotionally available guy” is, “I want a guy who will express positive emotions towards and about me.”

That’s not emotional availability.

That’s emotional validation.

For you.

What you really want is a guy who makes you feel good about yourself.

Relieves your insecurities about whether you are really worthy and really loved.

You don’t want a guy who is truly authentic and shares ALL his feelings with you.

Don’t worry.

That won’t be happening anytime soon.

Because we know the drill.

We know you don’t care about how we really feel.

We know our job is to make you feel good while we bear the brunt of the world on our shoulders for you.

And we don’t mind.

Really we don’t.

For the most part we’re willing to do that for you because we picked up on that role a long, long time ago.

Of course I do have my own opinion on the value of this game.

Despite the fact both nature and society have programmed us in this direction.

Because I think guys who are authentic make better partners.

Because they are not playing games with you.

Not keeping up appearances for you.

Yes it can be much scarier being with a guy who exposes his underbelly, and lets you see his raw reality.

Because it means as a girl you will have to be your own safety and security after all.

Because you’ll realize finally that he’s not really yours.

That’s just smoke and mirrors.

You will have to stop looking to your partner to make up for your lack.

Stop pretending it is his job to make everything okay for you.

You can press through these fears and insecurities. You can become a person who is complete in yourself.

When you do that?

You’ll be ready to be in a truly authentic relationship.

A relationship with a guy who feels free to be himself with you.

Free to share his joys and his challenges.

His highs and his lows.

To be truly emotionally available with you because now he knows he safely can.

I can help you.

I can show you what you need to do to truly have that rich, loving relationship you desire.

Don’t spend anymore time with emotionally unavailable guys – contact me today for your FREE initial consultation!

What do you think? Are you ready to take the first step toward a real flesh and blood guy who is truly emotionally available with you?

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