It never ceases to amaze me.
How many ways you girls find.
Ways to always say no to love.
You say no to love when it’s offered to you.
You say no to love when you have it.
You seem to be in a perpetual state of discontent with how love actually works and how you can really truly have a rich love in your life.
I know what I’m saying is true.
Because I love many of you myself.
I’ve offered you the love you say you desire.
But you simply will not have it.
True to form the highest volume is those of you who refuse my offer in the first place. I just don’t come in the package that you’re thinking love should come.
I have dated more than 50 of you girls.
Over the course of the last few years now?
Again and again I’ve heard your common refrain.
You don’t see me as “romantic potential” for you.
You think I’m “wonderful” but “not like that.”
Classical “friend zone” stuff.
Yet this isn’t really a friend zone situation at all. I learned a long time ago a better way to handle the friend zone thing. I just don’t participate.
I keep on loving you though you give me the pass.
Then I go on meeting other girls anyway.
Offering them love as well.
Just like I did with you in the first place.
If you ever decide to change your mind?
And I’d love us to start when you’re ready.
Start connecting in the deep and meaningful way.
The way I know you are truly desiring.
And then there are those of you who have actually begun a relationship with me. You finally decide to take the risk of opening up your heart to me.
Time and again I hear you say how happy you are.
How you’re enjoying the love you’re experiencing.
A love based on mutual desire to really connect.
This goes on for a time.
Sometimes a few months.
Sometimes a few years even.
But then something starts to happen.
Eventually you begin to wonder why the love you are experiencing is so rich. Surely there has to be something wrong so you begin to scratch at it.
You start to look away from love.
To everything else you wanted.
Or everything else you think you “should” want.
Suddenly the love right before you?
It isn’t good enough now.
Not because it isn’t great.
You tell me over and over it is.
You prove this by freely coming back to me.
Again and again and again.
Though I keep giving you my heart without reserve you seem unable to believe it. So you start to see all sorts of tell tale signs that you’re convinced mean your love really is not secure.
Eventually this paranoia of yours?
It gets the better of you.
You start to believe you are losing your love.
That it is a matter of time until it leaves.
So rather than wait until that “fateful day?”
You say no to love once again.
You leave before it hurts you.
And so I find myself once again trying to comprehend and understand why you girls so perpetually find yet one more way to say no to love.
But there is no point seeking a solution to this.
Just like there isn’t really a friend zone?
There isn’t really a problem with love either.
It is a problem that’s deep inside YOU.
It stems from your own insecurities.
Until that changes you will always say no to love but I will always still be here waiting.
Ready to love you.
Because I know there’s nothing wrong with love.
So I keep holding my heart open to it.
Believing you will one day see this.
Do you resonate with what I’m saying? Do you find yourself in this perpetual cycle of refusing love or sabotaging the love you’re enjoying?
Like what you’re reading? Sign up!