You are currently viewing The Best First Date Is No First Date (Part 3)

The Best First Date Is No First Date (Part 3)

This entry is part 3 of 3 in the series The Best First Date Is No First Date

Okay I have a confession to make.

I sort of misled you.

When I said you’re better off not to date?

It’s because of what you think a real date is.

Because the modern dating scene is all about guys trying to “sweep you off your feet” and impress you? That whole thing is so counter productive I decided to just tell you all to quit.

But in actual fact?

That’s not what a REAL date should consist of.

Instead what should you focus on?

Getting to know each other first!

A real date should be a time when you express only appropriate levels of affection. Before you actually know each other that would exclude most of what you think a real date is.

Sex should be completely out.

Come on admit it!

Until you have an emotional connection?

That just confuses everyone.

But other forms of sexual touching should also be kept off the agenda. Your focus should be on activities and conversation that let you learn what makes each other tick.

This is why just “hanging out?”

It is not the terrible negative you think it is.


This is exactly how your time initially should be spent.

I would be quite happy to call what I’m describing a date if I could get away with it. Eventually this very activity is what expands into your full romantic friendship.

At first you enjoy recreational companionship.

Which leads to more and more conversation.

Conversation leads to intimacy.

That’s “into me you see” in case you forgot.

Once you come to know each other more you develop a genuine emotional connection. This leads to more and more affectionate expressions on your part.

At first that might be holding hands.

And then it could be cuddling.

And yes eventually making out.

And ultimately making love.

What do you think? Given what everybody feels these days should be included in “dating,” am I right from what I’ve told you here to just tell you not to date?

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Series Navigation<< The Best First Date Is No First Date (Part 2)

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