You’ve probably heard of the battle of the sexes?
I wrote about it here and here.
And when you think of love and relationships, you think that is where the battle lies.
Guys want sex.
Girls want emotional connection and commitment.
Never the twain shall meet.
But actually that’s not where the REAL battle lies.
The alleged battle of the sexes is really just a skirmish in the bigger battle I’m talking about.
And this little skirmish you’re focused on?
It is very much designed to keep you distracted.
To keep your eyes away from where your most important battle for love is going to be won or lost.
If you don’t change your focus, you will miss out on REAL love.
And miss out on what is in your REAL best interests.
Let me explain.
As a guy you’re naturally addicted to sex.
Your tendency is to want to reproduce…aka “spread your seed.”
I hear a lot of agreement coming from the girls on this one.
They see this as “the problem.”
But you girls are naturally addicted too.
What you want is “romantic love.”
Notice the quotes?
That’s because “romantic love” is not the same as REAL romantic love.
Despite all your beliefs to the contrary girls, your desire for “romantic love” is actually your natural tendency to want to reproduce too.
You want to find someone who’ll “provide and protect.”
While you have a couple babies in this life.
This is why “romantic love” is nature’s sell job.
Everything I’ve described so far that you THINK you want, has nothing to do with REAL romantic love.
Your desire to be “swept off your feet” is no more about REAL romantic love, than is a guy’s desire to “bed a pornstar.”
All of this is strictly about BIOLOGY.
The true battle is between biology and REAL romantic love.
This “attraction distraction” of “How do I get in her pants?” and “How do I get him to commit and make sure that he’s the one?” It’s just a little skirmish nature uses, to keep your attention off this real battle, between biology and love.
Because as long as you stay worried about these incidental questions?
You won’t figure out what’s in your own BEST interest at all.
Because none of the above is in YOUR best interest.
It has nothing to do with YOUR long term relationship well being.
In fact, it virtually guarantees your well being is going to fail.
It only has to do with REPRODUCTION.
Keeping the race going.
It has NOTHING – and I mean ABSOLUTELY NOTHING at all – to do with REAL romantic love.
And since societies don’t go well without their populations reproducing too?
It is also in SOCIETY’S best interest to keep you distracted as well.
All your social programming is aimed at curbing you guys from having sex without “commitment” and encouraging you girls to “hold out” until you find THE ONE to marry and have babies with.
Everything in nature is aimed at this end.
Everything in society is aimed at this end.
But this end is not YOUR end, because it is not conducive to REAL romantic love.
It is all just a distraction.
The “attraction distraction.”
Because attraction ISN’T love.
You can be attracted to someone you don’t even know.
REAL romantic love is about coming to know and value the PERSON you claim to be in love with.
If you want REAL love in your life, you need to change your focus.
You need to start understanding how romantic love ACTUALLY WORKS.
Then you can change your behaviors accordingly.
That’s what I’m here for.
Both on this blog and with my clients, I help you learn the best way to configure your love life.
The way that will let you enjoy what you’re really after.
REAL romantic love.
Confused about all this?
You’re not alone.
Hit me up for a coffee or a Skype session and let’s talk.
Are the lights starting to come on? Are you finally coming to see that you have been focusing on the wrong battle all along?
Like what you’re reading? Sign up!
