When she said this I almost laughed out loud.

I often say things like this also.

Since we both work in the relationship space?

I took our similarities as a positive.

In her coaching practice what she is always telling you girls is before you get into a relationship you need to work on your self esteem as your first priority.

Don’t be chasing guys.

Don’t be looking for them at all.

Just work on yourself.

Trust that they will show up after that process.

Needless to say that is not what you girls want to hear because it sounds like she is telling you to forget about all your dating criteria.

And in a very real sense?

That’s exactly right.

Just like I do?

She also sees that as counter productive.

But when we were both discussing all this and talking about marketing ourselves she was expressing her frustration regarding this conundrum.

In sales?

It’s a well known fact.

If you don’t want to go broke?

You need to sell what people are wanting!

But as I’m telling you here all the time when it comes to good relationship beliefs you are simply your own worst enemy. If we sell you what you actually want you’ll end up with a failed love life.

Unfortunately she didn’t like my answer.

“Don’t worry about selling.”

“Just give people what they actually need.”

Needless to say even she wasn’t buying!

One advantage I have over her is I’m actually not trying to sell you a product. Yes I have a few books to make it easier for you to piece together my thoughts but right now I don’t charge for my actual consulting.

“What Kel? You don’t even charge?”

That’s right!

Right now I have a deal with God.

He pays the bills and I help who I can!

What do you think? Should we give you what you really want and just focus on your love life symptoms or should we keep giving you the tough medicine so eventually your love life will be better after all?