“I have to choose?”
The reaction on their faces was precious.
I got to know these two girls in a course I was taking.
We all became very close.
So much so that they decided I ought to choose between them.
Which one of them should be my girl?
Of course this whole thing was just tongue in cheek, and we were just having a good time together. I was nowhere near starting a relationship with either one of them at the time.
But my response was quite sincere.
Clearly it pushed against everything they knew.
Especially the Slavic girl with her hardcore MONOGAMY background.
Yes she was progressive.
Had a Masters at SFU.
But she still was all about that boyfriend she left back home.
The other girl was from elsewhere too, and she and I connected immediately the very first time we met. We joked and teased and played around, as if we knew each other for years.
Even though we were not a thing at the time?
She was really taken by me.
And I by her really.
We spent more and more time together.
And the chemistry grew and grew.
But the sticking point for starting a real relationship, was that hard core monogamy thing. She just couldn’t see why I felt that Romantic Friendships was really the way to go.
But that’s just how I roll now.
My reply to the two of them that day was sincere.
I really wouldn’t want to choose.
I loved them both.
Because they were so very different.
Each one special in her own way.
Why would I want to have to choose between the two of them, if I could enjoy romantic connection with both of them in my life?
Sadly that boyfriend back home won out.
So the other girl it was.
She continued to try to negotiate monogamy.
But it was never going to be.
She almost decided we were a no go for this reason.
But in the end she “caved.”
Became a “pushover” as she called it.
I think it had something to do with loving me! Finally realizing that love was more important than a silly way of configuring how it all should play out.
We had an enjoyable few months.
Then she moved on.
That hit me quite hard as well.
Polyamorous people ask me,
“Should you have a relationship with a hard core monogamy girl?”
My answer is a resounding, “Yes!”
Those few months were some of the most precious in my life.
I wouldn’t trade them for a thing.
How about you? Are there a couple of people in your life so special to you, that you’d rather not choose between them?
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