“I think you’re a wonderful girl.” I said.

“But I also think SHE’s a wonderful girl.”

“So the question is, can you enjoy an intimate connection with me?”

“Without worrying if she connects with me too?”

And that right there my darling girls, is the secret to a happy love life. When you can get past your discomfort with what I said there, you can really begin to love.

Because love?

It is not about having.

It has nothing to do with possessing.

Love is in the “desiring.”

The “wanting.”

THAT’S the key.

You think your love life is not working out, because you can’t get a guy to truly love you. You think he is emotionally unavailable, when really the unavailable one is YOU.

How do I know this?

I’ve talked with the guys.

When I describe the above conversation?

Almost unanimously they give me a resounding, “Yes!”

They want to love you, and give you their heart. They just don’t want you to TRAP them. They want to be free to love who they love. And yes, one of the people they love is YOU!

They aren’t emotionally unavailable at all.

They just intuitively know what will happen.

As soon as they give you what you think you want?

The whole thing will go downhill from there.

It’s a terrible trick of nature I know. And you always struggle to get you mind wrapped around it. Your feelings tell you that you need to find “the one,” and get him to commit to you.

I can’t do this for you.

You’re the one who has to resist that.

If you don’t get smarter than your DNA?

Your heart will break.

Again and again.

But if you will just open up your heart instead, and embrace the love that’s right in front of you? You’ll find out you can enjoy a deeper love than you can, when you give up your independence.

It’s a paradox.

What you try to GRASP?

It always escapes you.

But love your partner with an open hand?

Instead of flying away?

He’ll keep coming back to you!

What do you think? Could you finally let go of your need to find a guy to commit to you, and instead just open up your heart to love so it will keep returning to you?