So apparently they’ve done some studies.
They’ve looked into your (mis)perceptions.
How much or little you think the opposite sex is interested in you?
Turns out you’re wrong more often than you’re not.
Unsurprisingly as a guy you are likely to OVERESTIMATE a girl’s interest in you but a girl is likely to UNDERESTIMATE your interest in her.
Needless to say this makes for problems.
A #metoo time bomb just waiting to go off for you.
If she isn’t looking to you expecting your interest?
Your expressing it is bound to make her “feel uncomfortable.”
How do you guys get this wrong?
Girls send you nothing but subtle signals.
You depend on unreliable indications of interest (IOIs).
You’re the one “expected” to pursue.
I suspect I don’t have to convince any of you guys that mind reading is something girls always “hope for” from you. This carries on far beyond the initial dating phase into your actual relationship.
As a guy you’re not a mind reader though.
So what do you do instead of it?
You work with your best information.
What else can you do?
Let’s face it though. Eye contact? Eyebrow flashing? Open body posture and smiling? You might as well be searching for a needle in a haystack.
If this is it?
If that’s all you’ve got to work with?
Is it really any surprise?
You’re bound to get more than a few potential cues wrong!
The research speculates the reason girls do this is they are concerned about sexual double standards. They don’t want to be perceived as permiscuous at all and they also want time to evaluate you first.
So what do you do?
You think like a guy.
If she’s dressed sexy?
She MUST want you to approach her.
If you picked up on her subtle emotional expressions though?
You’d be much more likely to get this right.
But you’re a guy so none of that occurs to you. Instead you do a cost/benefit analysis on your potential opportunity. Even if you’re wrong about her interest in you, if you assume she is interested you’re more likely to succeed than not.
Assuming she’s not interested?
That’s a LOSING plan from the outset.
Then you won’t act.
And you’ll guarantee your failure.
Though YOU perceive dating as a numbers game the feel of this article is that’s a bad thing and you shouldn’t do it. The reason is because by doing so you might end up making her feel “uncomfortable.”
Heaven forbid you should ever do that!
Of course I’m not suggesting you be obnoxious.
And learning to discern those subtle cues of hers?
That can only improve your percentages over time.
But until you’ve developed the necessary mind reading skills, exploring her potential interest by just approaching her is still the best way to find out if a girl is interested in you.
Until someone can convince me otherwise?
That it’s the end of the world to make a girl feel “uncomfortable?”
I’ll continue to advocate you overestimate her interest.
I’ll continue to suggest this as a good idea for your dating life.
What do you think? Is it really a big deal if you make a girl “feel uncomfortable” just because you approach her to explore her potential interest in you?