“He and I really care about each other.”
“But we’re ‘just friends‘ and totally platonic.”
“She and I like to hookup for sex.”
“But that’s all it is.”
You are probably well aware of the above two types of friendships. What you might not yet acknowledge though, is the hybrid between them.
As I began to evaluate myself?
I found I don’t fit either of these two categories.
I’m not “out for sex.”
But when I care for a girl?
I usually find myself wanting more.
This is an experience I find is very common among the male population. Any guy who really has a heart for girls, finds “just friends” or “just sex” to be “just not enough.”
These guys often complain to me.
“Why do I keep getting relegated to the friend zone?”
The answer of course?
You girls think friendship and romance don’t mix.
When it comes to guys who are friends, you think platonic is the only option. You either have sex with a guy and hope he’ll commit, or you don’t, and you see him as “just a friend.”
The problem with that program?
The guys you have sex with always love you and leave you.
The guy you like as “just a friend?”
He’s the guy who will actually stick around.
But even he is smart enough by now to know that monogamy is a failure. What he wants is to upgrade your platonic friendship, to romantic friends.
“He wants what?”
“You mean he wants us to be ‘friends with benefits?”
Nope.
That’s the second kind of friendship I mentioned above.
The one that’s “just sex.”
Instead of being “just friends” or “just sex,” this third type of friendship is based around a romantic connection. You love each other so much, you want to share yourselves this way too.
“You mean he wants to be boyfriend and girlfriend?”
Nope.
He just wants to be romantic friends with you.
The main difference between this and “just friends?”
It’s really only a change of perspective for you.
Once you realize you already love each other as friends?
You just evolve your friendship to the next level.
What do you think? It is really impossible to fall in love with that platonic friend of yours, or have you been letting what society says, get in the way of a much deeper connection still?
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In regard to the upgrade platonic friendship blog/article, I have been in one for awhile. He doesn’t do traditional relationship stuff but will do birthday and Valentine’s Day. He will always respond quickly to calls or texts. Never initiates dates but always says yes when I do. He has stated he is crazy for me. Think he might be avoidant to some extent. Has never approached sex or mentioned it. We are in our 60’s and neither of us have ever been married. Not sure what the odds are of this ever changing. Thoughts anyone?