It’s always hard to watch the Battle Of The Sexes in action.

Everybody is trying to figure out how to get what they want from their partners.

When you’re single you’re trying to figure out how to get someone to love you.

When you’re in a relationship you’re trying to get your needs met.

When you experience a break up, you want to know how to make sure it never happens again.

What you have to understand is, you’re thinking about this all the wrong way.

A loving relationship is a mutually shared thing.

You value your partner so much that you want them in your life and you want to share yourself with them.

Notice I didn’t say get them to share themselves with you?

That’s what’s messing you up.

I recently experienced a breakup. A partner who I was experiencing a wonderful connection with for the past year decided it was time to move on.

I felt sad when she told me this.

I asked if there were things we needed to talk about.

Things that had been left unsaid, we should have clarified.

But the net effect when the dust cleared, was she chose to end our relationship.

You might be thinking I’ve mis-named this blog post, because obviously I lost her, but that’s not the case at all.

She’s still with me in the wonderful memories I have, of our times shared together.

I’ve told this to many people since she left.

How wonderful she was.

That I don’t have a single regret.

Because I don’t.

When she and I parted ways, I told her I loved her and that if things changed for her I am totally game to pick up where we left off.

And I mean it.

I don’t really break up with anyone.

Because when I come to love a girl, that never really changes for me.

Sometimes it does for them though and I respect that.

I don’t want someone with me who doesn’t want to be with me.

So for me there is no real Battle Of The Sexes.

I just try to be who I am and trust that girls in my life who encounter me, will experience me as someone they want to be with.

If they do and I share that same desire, I’ll begin a relationship with them.

As long as we continue to desire our connection, we’ll be in each other’s lives.

And yes sometimes that shifts to being just friends too.

Though I rarely desire that once I’ve experienced a romantic connection with a girl.

I hope you can see what I’m talking about here. How you can make sure you never lose your lover.

Quit trying to possess and own them.

Just share yourself with them.

Receive the same from them as they share themselves with you.

Love your lover with an open hand and let them come and go as they please.

That way they will always be in your life.

So how about you? Would you like to make sure you never lose your lover too?