I was in a great conversation last night.
A group of guys and girls got together to discuss relationships.
I love these types of conversations.
So often girls stay “over there” in their own little groups, assuming what guys are feeling.
And guys do the same.
So whenever you can get the two groups together magic happens.
The walls come down.
The assumptions start to peel away.
We start to see each other as we really are.
Often for the first time ever.
This really was a great event and I was enjoying myself immensely.
But then the inevitable happened.
The thing that causes so much challenge in relationships.
Leads so often to their demise.
One of the guys said something insensitive that hurt one of the girls’ feelings.
The whole mood of the meeting changed.
So much of the value was lost.
And once again it became obvious.
Guys are way too insensitive.
And that’s why relationships break down.
Girls are caring and giving and relating, while guys just don’t get it. They can’t sustain the good feelings in the relationship and so it ultimately ends.
The point of no return ensues.
Of course, everything I’ve written so far could be rewritten in reverse like so:
I was in a great conversation last night.
A group of girls and guys got together to discuss relationships.
I love these types of conversations.
So often guys stay “over here” in their own big huddles assuming what girls are thinking.
And girls do the same.
So whenever you can get the two groups together magic happens.
The walls come down.
The assumptions start to peel away.
And we start to see each other.
Often for the first time ever.
This really was a great event and I was enjoying myself immensely.
But then the inevitable happened.
The thing that causes so much challenge in relationships and leads so often to their demise.
One of the girls got overly sensitive about something one of the guys said.
The whole mood of the meeting changed.
So much of the value was lost.
And once again we could see that girls are way too sensitive.
And that’s why relationships break down.
Guys are logical and practical and to the point and girls just can’t handle it. The only thing that matters to them is their feelings. So the guys end up having to admit their WRONG again…just for being guys.
If they don’t, the girls’ feelings are done.
The point of no return ensues.
Listen girls, you SAY you want to understand us guys.
But every opportunity we give you the reality is just too much for you.
I’ve said it before, you girls just want to be lied to.
Problem is girls, this isn’t getting you anywhere. If you want to just “feel good” go hang out with your girlfriends.
Your guy may feel insensitive to you at times but he’ll also be reliable when you need him to be.
If you really want to understand him, stop trying to turn him into a girl.
I agree with you.
Guys DO need to up their sensitivity.
I work on them quite a lot about that, both on this blog and person to person.
But you need to develop a tougher skin too. Your guy is NEVER going to be a girl.
If you’re attracted to girls that’s a different story.
If that’s the case then all power to you.
But if you’re reading this blog, I assume what you’re really wanting is a guy.
If so then you need to get over yourself and get with the program!
As one of my female relationship coach friends often says, “Guys aren’t just hairy girls!”
What do you say girls? Is your guy too insensitive or is it time you learn to suck it up a little?
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I’m glad you reversed the male/female roles in the second half of your blog, because as I started to read it, I actually thought the same thing…that men could say that it was HER being too sensitive. Of course, what’s missing here is exactly what comment the guy made that offended the girl in the first place. Nonetheless, I think it’s a shame that the girl taking offence to the guy(who was likely just being brutally honest), took away from the whole focus of the meeting in the first place. So much good, and male/female understanding could’ve potentially come out of that gathering had it not been derailed. I can actually visualize myself being in that meeting when the girl took offense, and thinking: “Oh great, here we go!” I was also imagining if I was the host, what I might say to get things back on track. I do think I would’ve intervened, acknowledging after awhile that her concerns were heard, however we mustn’t lose sight of our main purpose in gathering together in the first place.