I like a lot of what Matthew Hussey has to say.
Often he points you girls in the right direction.
But I saw a Facebook post of his the other day.
I really had to stop and laugh.
It was about the constant advice you girls get from your dating coaches. They tell you over and over again to make your list and check it twice.
You don’t want to end up with the wrong guy do you?
Just imagine what a nightmare that would be!
Actually a lot of you don’t need to imagine.
I hear about it from you all the time.
How you ended up with that narcissistic guy.
How he cheated and tried to control you.
The fact is no matter how many lists you make you don’t seem to be making a lot of headway. Somehow those guys keep slipping through your safety net despite all your best efforts.
But in this piece Hussey is really messing with you.
Now he’s telling you you’re being TOO picky.
When you live in a world of infinite choice?
How can you really find “the one?”
Maybe your standards are too high after all.
Who you’ll live with IS important.
But by being obsessed like this?
You don’t give guys a chance.
“There aren’t any good guys out there!” you cry. Hussey answers, “No one? Are you serious? Really?” Yet all you’re doing is what he’s told you to do in the past so what else did he expect?
The fact is this conundrum?
It’s INHERENT to monogamy.
What you’re suffering from is Monogamy Dyslexia.
Because you have to pick just one person to love?
You have to be VERY picky.
But then you can’t choose anyone.
After all what if you choose WRONG?
If you compromise on your criteria for Mr Right and the perfect match for you? Your relationship life could be ruined before it even starts.
So what should you do with your love gurus’ advice?
What they give with one hand they take away with the other!
Use your HEAD instead.
Recognize what they are feeding you is a total contradiction.
Your standard is not too high.
You are chasing an IMPOSSIBILITY.
You cannot choose the perfect match that will guarantee your life won’t be destroyed in the long run. As long as you are putting all you eggs in one basket you are actually guaranteeing you’ll fail.
I’ve already told the guys how to find the perfect girl.
She is out there in a lot of different people.
You girls would do well to take my advice there too.
Stop expecting any ONE guy to be everything.
“Oh,” you say. “I’m not expecting him to be everything.”
“He just needs to meet ENOUGH of my criteria.”
That’s right. Because those other things you’ve decided aren’t your “deal breakers” won’t wear you down and discourage you eventually!
Listen to any relationship coach on this?
It is those LITTLE things that finally get to you.
One of those endless little compromises monogamy requires?
It will be the straw that breaks the camel’s back.
Once again I’m sorry to be the bearer of bad news.
There is only ONE cure for Monogamy Dyslexia.
Choose not to participate in the monogamy game at all.
That’s the only way to guarantee he will never disappoint you.
What do you say girls? Is it time to stop listening to that illogical love advice and start pursuing a love life that’s actually possible?
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