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Are You Sure You’re Not Polyamorous? (Part 5)

This entry is part 5 of 5 in the series Are You Sure You’re Not Polyamorous?

If monogamy is so “natural?”

Why must you always “protect” it?

Worry what your partner is up to?

And make sure you don’t get up to anything yourself?

In a recent discussion in a Facebook group, this glaring fact was once again front and center. A girl was worrying about her partner’s interactions with his “ex.”

“My partner has told me bits.”

“How they split up 4 years ago.”

“But I’ve found out 4 months ago?”

“He still thought there was a chance for them.”

The problem wasn’t that he considered the possibility, because this was all before this girl and her partner were together. The problem for her was why he’d never shared this particular fact with her.

He’s shared a lot about is ex.

But for some reason this point he hadn’t.

“Why is he concealing this?” she asked.

“What does it mean?”

“Is my partner ashamed of bringing it up or scared I might leave if I found out? Or is it something that isn’t my business and not worth talking about?”

Others in the group replied.

“He needs to cut contact with her. Period.”

“It’s clear he’s remained in contact.”

“He still has feelings for her.”

Other people became curious. “How did you come by this information?” and “Why are you afraid of being vulnerable about it with him?”

I laugh as I think about it.

How opposite would be my reaction.

When a former partner experienced a love interest?

I encouraged her to see where it would lead.

No matter how you slice it, monogamy is just an illusion. You’re trying to convince yourself you could never love anybody else, even though very frequently you do.

The sooner you face this?

The sooner you EMBRACE it?

The sooner all those worries you have?

They’ll fade away for you.

What do you think? Should you really be so concerned whether you or your partner fall in love with another, or should you open up your hearts and encourage each other?

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